Cupcake, is murder still illegal? (Someone may be in trouble)

illegalmurderMy husband may not be safe. We have had a few spats here and there–what married couple hasn’t?–but this time, he may have gone too far. So, with all the violence that has gone unchecked due to the absence of accountability, I’m wondering: if I have a great excuse, Cupcake, is murder still illegal? 

OK, before I get to the real reason for my rage, you need to know two things for background purposes. I’ll be brief. Sort of. Brief for me.

 

The first thing you need to know is that we have three dogs, and our

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Cheyenne wanting to play horribly early

golden, Cheyenne, is his favorite. He has broken all his rules. She was supposed to stay outside; she was inside the first day. She was supposed to stay on the floor; she is a great cuddler on whatever couch you choose to sit. She was supposed to go to puppy school; after three weeks of her being ahead of the other puppies, as well as teacher’s pet and the biggest ham for treats, we decided dog park and regular walks would be better. I did win the battle of keeping her in her crate at night, after, of course, she crawled into our bed at 4:30 am and wanted to play.

The second thing you need to know is that last week our vet removed a tumor from her chest, and the surgery was a little complicated because the tumor was in her muscles. Cancer free, they gave her scrubs.

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Cheyenne in her scrubs

In the spirit of briefness, let me just say that we are using our “Good Will shirts” to keep her stitches (well, now just a gaping hole where the stitches were) from catching on anything, and simultaneously keeping our carpet clean. We are probably rotating about six towels (we have them on her bed and her favorite sleeping places), and three soft t-shirts a day. Until now, it hasn’t been a problem. Up until now, everyone has been relatively happy.

 

This morning, while I was teaching, my husband sent me this text. davetextTo you, this is a regular shirt. To me, it’s one of my favorite lounging t-shirts, which was most definitely NOT in the Good Will pile. Ever. I love my dog. I love my husband. But I draw the line with my CLOTHES!!!

So, when I finally arrived home and asked him why he used my shirt, Dave said, “Because your clothes are so much softer.” Duh.  His second excuse was, “I haven’t seen you wear it in a while, so I figured you weren’t using it any more.”

And this is why I want to kill him twice.  After I pull out all my hair.

And just so everyone is clear, Cheyenne doesn’t feel the least bit guilty, and she is not happy about losing “her” new soft shirt.

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Does this look like a guilty face to you? She likes my shirt!

So, two more things you need to know (sorry).

1.   Because of all the sunblock (which is usually sweat-proof and water-proof, and applied multiple times) on my clothes, we do our own laundry.

2.   Also, because of all the sunblock, the clothes I wear in the summer are usually ruined by September. So, I’m sure you’ll understand, I do not wear clothes I like, unless I go somewhere cold (like the movies).

My husband and I have been married for eight years, and he has known me for nine. Ten years must be the magic number for him to remember this tidbit of information about me.

The truth is, I want him to remember this NOW. I want him to remember this when he got up this morning and decided, “Hey, I’ll just use one of Liz’s shirts. They are so much softer than mine, and she isn’t wearing many of them, anyway.” Grrrrr! It’s a good thing they are both cute.

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How can I stay angry at this face?

 

Since I am promised a new piece of clothing to add to my wardrobe (and my shirt has been washed multiple times), I will refrain from murder. After all, I do love the man. I would miss him. And the last time I checked, murder is still illegal.

So, my darling Cupcake, when have you ever been angry at a loved one for something silly? What was the resolution?

http://ownyourcupcake.comAs always, let me know how it’s going, and stay frosted!

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39 thoughts on “Cupcake, is murder still illegal? (Someone may be in trouble)

  1. Justifiable homicide may be an option. I have not checked out the “prisonwear” in Texas in case things go wrong, but I would promise to visit – (even though I am not fond of that place – another story – another time)

    You’ve been quiet – I got a little worried! It good to know you were only contemplating murder!

    1. Trenna, they wear hot pink in New Mexico, lol. We have been on the no-sleep plan once we got her home from surgery. I didn’t want to write when my eyes were blurry. 🙂 I will write tomorrow! Glad you stopped by, Cupcake!

      1. Hot pink is good to know. Everything my mom ever purchased for me was hot pink or red. Maybe she knew murder would be in my future!

        Hope every thing is going well.

        1. Trenna, keep your chin up! I’m pulling a Sabine and doing everything on my phone because my computer is crashing! Ugh!

  2. Awww, but look at his gorgeous eyes 😉 I’ve got a little dog, they get away with so much, we treat them like babies. Hope you get a lovely new top to replace it, much better than prison wear I’m sure!

    1. Ruby, our malamute is a champion beggar. They all know how to use those eyes, don’t they? I’m glad you get it, and thank you for your comment! Have a cupcake kind of week. 🙂

  3. Such fun to read your posts and I will miss them and you, but I’m sure your students will love you and your humor.
    First thought: Teach your hubby to do his wash the way you do yours so his clothes get soft too.
    Secondly: Make sure you really buy yourself a special new top that he pays for & buy an everyday one too.
    Third: Remind him the TV series “How to Get away with Murder” will be starting again soon, so he does have to be careful.

    1. Roslyn, we think all the cleaning agents we are using to rid the fabrics of blood and ooze are ruining the softness. Of course, this is what fabric softener is for.
      As for thoughts 2 & 3: I’m on it, Cupcake! Thank you for watching out for me! 🙂

    1. Sherri, Thank you for the good wishes toward Cheyenne, and it is extremely hard to be angry with her for very long about anything. She’s a golden, so she’s a great cuddle buddy and shoulder to cry on, lol. Have a cupcake kind of week! 🙂

    1. Katarina, Thank you! Of course, now I have to go write a post either making myself look bad, lol, or making my husband look awesome. But I am so very glad you understand me! Have a cupcake kind of week! 🙂

  4. Glad you decided against the murder, not sure if you have internet in prison and I would really miss your stories…
    This one made me laugh, my sister looks at me like I am crazy, because we are sitting at the airport and I randomly burst out into laughter 😀
    But I can understand you, didn’t wuite want to kill her, but she had to take one thing with her to ireland, the guidebook and now guess what she forgot? While I did the whole work organizing -.- she’s buying a new one later, so I am happy again 😀
    Sending you a hug to Texas and hopefully I myself will be posting soon again 🙂

    1. Sabine, your sister and my sister are from the same planet. I’ll bet you don’t get in trouble when you get angry at her! lol. Have an awesome trip to Ireland, take plenty of pictures for me, and get in a post when you can! Wishing I was your travel buddy, kungfuprincess! Safe travels, friend, and have a cupcake trip!

      1. Ha good to know,maybe we should be sending those two on a tour, should be pretty interesting, and fun for us to watch 😉
        And thank you, so far all great :)…loving the people here and the countryside, there will soon be some amazing pictures up ’cause I am making time just for writing 🙂 – while my sis takes an afternoon nap 😀
        Who knows maybe we will do a trip together at some point, I for sure would love to have you as a travelbuddy, promise not to go all budget 😉 wishing you a wonderful day and enjoy some sun for me (here it’s always raining)

        1. Sabine-Hey, Budget traveling is good. I’m too old to sleep on the floor, though. Lol. Somehow we need to talk to Mother Nature and get her to share your rain and my sunshine. We’ve gone 30 days without rain, and the temp is 106 F today.

    1. Thanks, Sharon! I want to hear some stories, too, so feel free to share this post with anyone you know. The more, the merrier, right? Ha! Thanks for stopping by, and have a cupcake kind of week!

    1. Carol, you do know you can subscribe, right? Come on, it’s just a little button and confirmation email. I wonder if I could ever become a millionaire after my stint in funky scrubs? lol

  5. Knowing that coming from a place of anger is probably not good for anyone’s health, even Cheyenne’s, I would probably take it to a conversation and hopefully get it resolved as quickly as possible. And maybe then just wash the shirt again and hope the message was well registered in my husband’s head for the future. 😉 Glad Cheyenne is doing well and hopefully this is just a temporary desire on your part to murder the one you love!

    1. Beverley, anger is not the appropriate word. The shirt was a gag from an ancient NFL star who will eventually be in the Hall of Fame. Just go, “Ohhhh.” lol. We worked it out. Our house is a happy place again, for which I am grateful! 🙂

  6. OMG, I’m laughing so hard because we are going through this right now. Spent a ton of money on training, I was the one doing it, Mia listens to one command words, sit, stay, wait, watch me, down, backup and the ever popular loud “aaaahhhh”. For our long walk after work today, we are approaching the street. Mia always sits when we stop. She didn’t this time. How does he tell her to sit? “Mia, sit, stay, wait, come on, sit”! Oh I get so mad when he does this, because he does it all the time! Poor Mia just looks at him with those dark brown eyes trying to understand him.

    1. Gisele, when we decided to get two dogs, we also found a dog trainer. The one thing that he told us to do, no matter how hard it is, is to give ONE command and wait for the dog to do it. Maybe it’s a guy thing to give multiple commands at once? lol. Dogs do not multitask, lol. Good luck to you and Mia, Cupcake!

  7. Love your blogs.. can’t wait for the book! You’d better give me the inside scoop.. I deserve it along with singing cards! lol BTW.. murder is only illegal IF you are caught! teehee.. I have a gun (many), and pepper spray, knives to cut them into small pieces, and even a shovel.. with nice biceps and back to cover it all up. 🙂

  8. I think with any marriage murder comes up… multiple times.
    Like the time his friends dropped in uninvited for dinner and I sent him down to the store so I could cook and I specifically wrote down brand, size, description in great detail and he brought something I couldn’t use despite having 3 degrees. Or the time the contractor doubled the bill and he was just going to pay. Or a host of other things. But he is still alive and we’re really happy about 99% of the time.

  9. Ummm…Kristen Wilson, I am pretty sure that providing Liz with a gun that makes you an accessory. I will visit both of you in prison and bring cookies…sorry I don’t do cupcakes 🙂

    1. Jackie, the jury may ask, “Wait, what NFL football player designed that shirt?” My innocence will depend on them being fans! Lol

    1. Barbara, thank you for the happy thoughts! She is loving my soft shirts! I am a little apprehensive about how she’s going to handle the end of wearing clothes, lol.

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